Right, Left, Listen

Speaking at a fundraiser for her presidential campaign in 2016, Hillary Clinton stated that half of Donald Trump's supporters belong "in a basket of deplorables"....she went on to say that "they are irredeemable...and they are not America."  

Continuing, Clinton stated that the "other basket of (Trump supporters) are people who feel that the government has let them down, the economy has let them down, nobody cares about them, nobody worries about what happens to their lives and their futures, and they’re just desperate for change."

Clinton's audience was democrats and her purpose was to raise funds for her campaign. She was simply rallying her constituency. She was defining the terms of the battle.  A political move that became central to the media's definition of the H Clinton candidacy. She couldn't get past it. She could not recover from it. 

In hindsight, that makes perfect sense. You cannot identify an entire segment of the American population as "irredeemable" (racist, sexist, homophobic, xenophobic, Islamaphobic..) and expect that to sit well.  Half of a basket of people, right?! That feels like a lot of Americans. 

On the other hand, she wanted to raise up marginalized people: black, brown, LGBTQI, and non-christian religious groups. Her intention, (rightfully so) was to reject division and embrace equity. 

Unfortunately, her strategy created enormous divisions. You cannot reject one segment of the population and embrace another segment without creating division. She divided Americans. 

We cannot throw away any American. We cannot tolerate hate from any part of our populace. We must respect those with whom we disagree. We must listen to their thoughts and opinions. We must. 

Listening to the viewpoints of others is central to our democratic system.  It is a basic tenant. It is a requirement. Without listening, we devolve into a polarized society.  When that happens, emotions rise and our ability to process logical thought is compromised.  At our worst, we  become violent. We have become violent. 

We are better than this. Our country needs us to be better than this. 

Alive or...?

Alive. Fully alive. What does that even mean? “Live everyday like it is the last!” How does one even do that? If it’s my last day, I am definitely not going to go to work, right?! Oops though..I am alive.  I will lose my job! How will I save for retirement, plan for college? Skydiving? Will I be fully alive when I am skydiving? Fully alive. How about the Bucket List? 

I may have figured this out. Maybe being fully alive is the pursuit of being fully present.  Fully present no matter what is going on.  In a world full of distractions, being fully present is pretty near impossible.  For instance, I will have to get rid of my apple watch and my phone. Just these devices, alone, create a distraction approximately 1 - 3 times per minute. I am constantly shifting focus. 99 percent of my notifications are pure trash.  I really only care about a few friends and my family. 

So, I am looking at my watch for notifications from these people. Or my boss. Why do I need instant notifications at all? Because someone might need me, be sick, or die. I need to know this stuff the second it happens?  It’s an expectation really.  But, I have that expectation, too.  I want my closest people to be immediately accessible to me.  Because, if they aren’t, what might happen? I might feel scared or alone when tragedy strikes?

Clearly my amygdala is driving my life. This is either embarrassing because this is not what anyone else does, or because everyone IS doing this.  Either way, it feels like an awkward confession.

You and You and You and You...

 In the age of social media it has become commonplace to put our worst moments on display.

I have tried to navigate that line. Letting you in to my world, but not overexposing myself. Let's be real, we all have dark, messy aspects to our "Selves". Rolling with me in my emotional mud is not something I would ever expect from you. Truthfully, I don't want to "go there" with you, either. A journal and a blog are not the same thing. 

I guess that's why it has been awhile since I have posted. Honestly,  I haven't had much to say that was sayable to you. Until today...

I have a question for you.  If there were a movie made about your life, who would you choose to play you?  Certainly there would be a child version of you, then an adolescent version, and depending on where you are on life's continuum,  there could be several more versions of you that would be required to fully tell your story. Who would you choose?  When you think about the actors you would choose to play you, what qualities do they have that resonate with the different versions of yourself that you see in your minds eye?  

That's it. Today, is just a little exercise in self-reflection. 

If you would rather not comment here, PM me on Facebook, Twitter, or Google Chat. Thanks for stopping by!

Be Safe, Be You.  Jules 💕

Grinding Stop

If you listen closely, you can almost hear the gears of our world grinding to a halt.  March Madness, the NBA playoffs, NHL, MLB... all stopped. Restaurants, movie theaters, bars, nightclubs are closing. There is no where to go but home. Home. Home.

Grinding Gears, by Stephen Green

People are sick, the economy is failing, and life has been disrupted in manner that is unprecedented. We have absolutely no idea what is coming, or how all of our systems and structures will bear the weight of this enormous,  little virus.

My feelings are a cocktail, a mixture of flavors that offend my taste and those that shift my focus to the swill that enlivens my senses.

So much of our world is centered upon distraction. The more we have advanced as a civilization the farther we have veered from our essential guideposts.  The speed at which we move makes it impossible to perceive the subtleties that illuminate our path. We have stumbled through uncharted terrain in micro-incremental steps.  Our path has led us nowhere except further and further from our essence and our homes. We are lost.

At least it feels like we are lost. Except there are other paths forward. Not a single path. There are many paths. Many ways that we can recover. Remember how it felt to get a pimple? Some of us had more than one. Or, how it felt to trip and fall in front of your friends? Mortifying experiences for anyone in the midst of adolescence. Very dramatic. Very big. Huge, in fact. But, it is not enormous.
It just feels that way.

The world is in the throws of adolescence. Like an adolescent growing into emergent bodies and abilities, we as a world have struggled to fully comprehend the magnitude and complex impact of our own material, technological and systemic changes. When we created the internet it felt like a Michael Jordan dunk from the free throw line moment. IT WAS! IT REALLY WAS!

Or, it could have been if we had only had the ability to examine the range of possible impacts of this advancement. A broader view of the cumulative affect of this change on our way of life. Something that an adult could do...someone whose executive function is fully online. But, sadly, our collective brains are closer to 12 than than 32.

Hence the stumbles, falling flat, bruises, and now COVID-19...a deadly virus. A world wide tragic wreck of a disease, that had we been thinking more like an adult than a tween, we could have prepared for. But we didn't. We couldn't. We were just kids.

It's time to grow up people.

There is NO ONE WAY forward. There are many paths. But, when we begin to move again, as a world, we need to do so in a very deliberate way. We need to self-regulate and co-regulate each other as we move from tween-ager to teenager to adulthood. It's time. Let's do this.

The Racist Next Door

There are racists in my neighborhood.  This is not my opinion. This is a fact. I have heard their words. I have heard them describe neighbors from other countries as "monkey's that just got off the boat". My racist neighbor is talking about someone that has a PhD in Physics and works for a Fortune 500 company.

My neighborhood is located in the most affluent county in the state of Indiana.  H Clinton, in the 2016 presidential election, coined Trump supporters as "the basket of deplorables".  I don't
think Clinton's characterization included my neighbor.  In fact, I don't think Clinton understood that the true deplorable's are her peers, colleagues, and neighbors in affluent and upper middle class neighborhoods. They are white men, who believe they are entitled to their white privilege.

I didn't stand up to my racist neighbor. My silence has allowed him to continue to relish in his privilege. No more. I am done being complicit. The cost is too high. Will you join me?

Walking With Children

For a child, missing breakfast can feel like a tragedy.  Not because he cannot survive the loss of calories, but because the food represents something missing from her life that is far larger. Perhaps, an unmet need for love, care, and emotional sustenance.

As a teacher, I frequently encounter unfavorable circumstances in the lives of the children I serve. Some students are not equipped to mask their difficult emotions, as many children (and adults) do. These students often develop, instead, emotional weapons that distort our perspective and originate from deep within their amygdala; the most primal area of the human brain.

Students who 'open carry' emotional baggage are a challenge for traditional classrooms. When a student who is emotionally-armed loses control,  a uniquely trained response is required. A response that redirects the child, allows other students to learn, and maintains the integrity of the teacher.

Teachers, and students are not generally trained to respond in a manner that meets this criteria. Consequently, outcomes vary.  Usually there are negative after effects.  What could have been a learning experience, in the end, inflicts further injury on some or all involved.

A Few Important Facts and Observations

• A well-programmed Robot should not lose control.  Humans do.  

• When Humans lose emotional control of themselves, there can be a range of negative outcomes.

• Losing emotional control of oneself is a traumatizing event. It is messy and very uncomfortable. 

• Between 1980 and 1992, the CDC reported an increase in suicide for the age groups 10-14 and 15 to 19.

Suicide devastates families and entire communities. Young people who are at greatest risk for suicide are those who are challenged by circumstances and emotions that are beyond their current control. In some cases, the causes seem obvious.  In other instances, the student may seem to have the 'perfect life.'

As teachers, we have a unique opportunity to work with our students, colleagues, and our communities to become trained and savvy regarding the emotional responses and well-being of our students.  How we handle the difficult emotional outbursts of our students sends a powerful message to all involved.  It isn't always, but it can become a positive message.

There are extraordinary gifts that can emerge from the most difficult situations.  I believe that the emotional well-being of our students is paramount to their success in school and life.  Creating a classroom where difficult situations are managed, to result in positive outcomes, is essential to developing a secure environment. An environment where all students can learn and thrive.

The Road Ahead: HomeSchool@ School

What can public schools learn from the homeschool movement? According to research, homeschoolers “typically score 15 to 30 percentile points above public school students on standardized academic achievement tests“(Ray, 2015). 

At first glance, class size is the obvious difference between these two groups. No doubt it is far easier to respond to student needs when the teacher student ratios are 1 to 3 versus 1 to 30.

Other advantages of a homeschool include, personalized curriculum, modified school start and finish times, and enrichment activities designed for the unique needs of student/children. 

A homeschool is a personal rather than an institutional environment. Schools are challenged to create a setting that is responsive, caring, and differentiated to meet student educational, social, and emotional needs. Today, the challenge for policy makers, investors, and educators is to redesign the public school setting to better meet these essential skills.  Twenty- first century students need more flexibility and control over their learning path, the structure of their day, and the way in which they choose to learn.

The school itself will need to support these attributes, with an emphasis on comfort, curricular options, and opportunities to play.  Schools need to invite students to the table, like customers or employees at high-end, technology-infused hubs, like Google and Amazon.  Only then, will schools begin to match the dynamic nature of the 21^st century workplace, where information, technology, and collaboration are necessary tools to solve authentic problems and create innovative solutions in a changing economy.

ESCAPE from EVERYWHERE

Yesterday, while getting my hair cut, my stylist said, "so I haven't seen you since the school shooting". "Right", I answered. Numbness and foreboding quickly spread throughout my body. As she continued to speak, her next few sentences floated somewhere above my auditory reach and hung in mid air.

 My brain struggled to shift from a "getting my hair cut mindset" to the "new normal".  A world where our youth are committing violent crimes against one another. 

Gun violence is no longer an 'inner city issue' that has been perpetuated by the media. The media has defined gun violence as an issue for people of color, poor people, people on drugs...or an issue executed by 'fatherless children' whose rage feeds upon a desire for 'Nike tennis shoes' and familial ties...by gang members whose reality is detached from our own, by the streets that separate our neighborhoods. 

Gun violence is in ALL neighborhoods. Gun violence is in ALL schools.  Even if gun violence has yet to occur, the potential exists EVERYWHERE.

As adults, we are responsible. I am responsible. 

The new normal mindset kicked in and my stylists words began to engage with my brain.  "...my daughter was running through the field and talking to me frantically...she was in the gym..the first out the door".  "I am so sorry", I said. "Is she OK?", I said. 

Our conversation continued as we shared our experiences as teacher and parent on that day. Fear crystallized as I attempted to shake the dread from my core.  I froze in place, on the inside.  My brain processed our conversation on autopilot and I was able to maintain a semblance of engagement. 

As I drove home, I was deeply shaken and yet unaware of the depth of my feelings until I arrived home,  hugged my spouse close, and burst into tears.

My Adventure

Advertisement: Help Wanted
Agile. Bend over. Your mine.

Fast-paced. Eat at your desk.

Global. Never Home.  

Team Player. Be my b*#@ch.

Vision.  Yours.

I am disappointed in myself and it is easier to blame you.

I need to clarify my vision.

I have floated, much of the time. Latching on to something until I have no longer enjoyed it. I have created myself through your eyes.

Now I am tired.  Tired of feeling resentful. Tired of giving myself away. Tired of being unclear.

This ride is gonna end. I don't want to go out feeling like I need a "do over".

What now?

I am going to paint the kitchen.

Also, I am going to keep writing. Writing is how I find myself.  The words are my map and this is my adventure.

We are Divinely Human

If there is a god, that Entity lives inside of each of us. A mere trace of god. When nurtured by prayer and strengthened through our actions, this trace of god becomes our home. A place that we can return to when wronged, injured, and broken.

Our humanness far exceeds our Divinity.  When disconnected from the Divine in us, our humanness can overtake and destroy us and anyone in our wake.  Our humanness is not our weakness. Though it appears so.  In fact, our humanness allows us to experience the exquisiteness of our connection to our physical form and the world in which we live.

Our children are in crisis.  They are longing for connection. They are lost, alone, angry, scared and disconnected from the beauty of their humanness and the Divine within. It is our charge to connect with our children and guide them.  Not with dogma but through modeling our own connection to the Divine.  Only then will each child begin to tether to the trace of god that resides within.  They will begin to make this Place their home and become capable of experiencing the profound gift of being human.

Silence is NOT Golden

The world is moving too fast. WAY too fast. If we would just slow down, imagine how much more we could accomplish...on so many levels.  I was speaking with a colleague this week about a young man who recently committed suicide. He was an outstanding student, an athlete, and connected to friends and family.  Recently, he had spoken with a counselor. This was his first and only conversation with a counselor. During that conversation he admitted to having thoughts of suicide. He also said he would never do it, because it would hurt too many people in his life. They were thoughts, he said. He would not take action, he said.

He did take action. At the age of 19, he bought a gun and killed himself...1 hour after he completed the purchase of the gun, he was dead. 1 hour. 1 hour later.

There were no signs. Yes. He was sad. Yes. He visited a counselor. Yes. He admitted to having suicidal thoughts. Yes.

 Seein g a counselor was a positive action, not a sign that suicide was imminent. He was a "good kid".  He was not a bullied, social outcast. He had a steady girlfriend. He had SO much to live for...but, he didn't think so. He is gone and the people connected to him are reeling from the impact.

The question in every one's mind is "Why?"  We will never know.  His scream, and the scream deep within so many of our talented youth, is silent. It is silent and it is deadly. Our young people are dying around us. This is an epidemic and we can't just go on doing what we are doing. It is not working.
We have to change. We have to slow down. We have to.  If we don't, the self-inflicted deaths of our youth will continue. They will continue to kill themselves because we can't hear their screams.

Teaching with Humanity

I often get called out for being self-effacing.  Truthfully, this is a misperception on the part of the complimenter. It is not that I am not appreciative of kind words...I AM!  I love it when people notice that students transform (often quickly) when placed in my program.  As a professional, nothing touches my heart more deeply.

The side step I take, when offered compliments regarding my students, is really an invitation to talk about how these techniques can benefit students in any educational setting.  I would love to take credit, I really would.  The reality is that these techniques can be employed by anyone!  For this reason, I have decided to share my perspective and techniques in the classroom.

I will be using this blog, along with other avenues, as a way to reach out and hopefully help other professionals experience similar success and delight as they watch their students transform.

Step 1: Ditch "Cool".  What is "cool" anyway?  Cool is a moving target. It is a whimsical concept that is often times only attached to surface characteristics and personality. 

Step 2:  Be You.  It is what is underneath that matters. Allow students to know you.  Especially, allow your students to see you as human. Being human involves making errors and corrections. This applies to all aspects of life: relationships, learning, trying new adventures, large and small. It applies to starting a hobby, leaving something behind, committing yourself to someone or something larger than you. Quality of life improves as imperfections are both recognized and accepted.  Making mistakes and corrections is the essence of school and life.

Step 3: Find and Walk Your Ethics.  While being you and being imperfect, it is also supremely important that you define and walk your ethics in all aspects of your work and life. That is, recognizing your imperfections while keeping your focus upon your objectives.  This process teaches students, through modeling, that standards matter. That having standards/ethics provides the direction, and challenges each individual to continue to move toward a better version of themselves.

My students know me. They don't know everything about me. But, they know my essence and my ethics. They understand what I value. They also understand that I allow each of them to explore and hold fast to their own values.  If you haven't noticed already, being a teacher is much more than being a content expert. In fact, content expertise though important, is secondary to your practice of being human.

Waiting to be Noticed

Following passion is going to be an epic ride.  No longer waiting to be noticed by others, it is time I noticed myself.  This is truly a breakthrough thought that occurred to me, as I started researching a new follower on my Twitter feed.  I can't begin to explain how social media works from an entrepreneurial perspective. How this follower came to follow me is a mystery. It doesn't really matter.  What caught my eye was her apparent courage (and fear) as she defined herself.  I started to look at her life as it appears online.  As I studied her, I felt a familiar feeling that, in the past, has been momentarily riveting, but that I have never actually followed.  The feeling is passion.  The passion for taking risks, for walking in truth and outside of ego.

In my youth, I took risks, both personal and professional. In some instances, I mistook ego for passion. The result was many stumbles and bruises. At the time, my ego was quite fragile.  The stumbles and bruises  felt like mortal wounds.  In fact, they were not. They did, however, lead me in a different direction.  They also humbled me. I had "failed". That "failure" haunted me for 13 years.  Until now.

Until today.

Today, as I read about this woman's life (online brand) I began to connect, once again, with my own passion.  I noticed that this passion was pure and disconnected from accolades, riches, and fame. Rather, the feeling was a nudge to notice myself, to notice my excitement and my potential.  It was a nudge to depend on myself and define my own path forward, one step at a time, in tune with my gifts, and ready to dive headfirst into an immersive and authentic life.

Little Risks = Big Shifts

Nicole has been telling me for years to get a "hobby"! My response has always been,  "I will when I don't have so much to do!" Secretly, I thought she was encouraging me to shirk my responsibilities.  In reality, she was simply trying to guide me toward expanding my "life practice".

This week, I realized I do have a hobby. Worrying. Talk about a treadmill that leads nowhere. What a bore, makes for excellent conversation, right?

Nicole: What did you do today, hon?"
Me: Uhhhhhh.....Worried.
Nicole: "Oh wow! Cool! How did that go?"
Me: Bad. Bad. Not good!
Nicole: "Yikes!  Watcha' gonna do tomorrow?"
Me: Same.
Nicole:  ??

22 years later...

This has been one long ride.  That is, until last week. Last week, I decided to take a small risk to shake it up. It couldn't hurt, right?  I could always go back to worrying.

So, last Wednesday, I took a jump at Hot Yoga.  It is a very sweaty business, which wasn't the risk.  The risk was all the MIRRORS! Somebody has put a middle-aged woman in my body! I am not kidding you. This was a complete shock and she looks absolutely nothing like me!

Worse yet, I joined the class with my friend the middle-aged super model.  You know the type..pretty, youngish, swaggy looking with rock hard abs and the legs of a 30 year old. Not cool. Plus, she had on this yoga attire that looked like a second skin. Her muscles ripped next to my cellulite infused thighs.  Nice. Great.

We laughed as she tried to help me look/feel presentable. Sweet as pie, she threw me yoga tops in the parking lot that no longer fit her, but made me look like a stripper in a wet tshirt contest. Laughing so hard, we both wished we had thought to wear a lady diaper.  We finally gave up, and I decided to rock my vneck cotton tshirt and my bell bottom running pants.

Once inside, we were both charmed by the effusive Hot Yoga instructor who tried to quell our fears of spending 1 1/2 hours in a 104 degree room performing yoga positions that were advertised for beginners, but in actuality, were more like moves from cirque du soleil.

But, we showed up and we tried. I made peace with the stranger in the mirror and managed to believe that I could finish the class without passing out or bolting from the room. And I did! Saturday we went back again.  This time, I had an outfit.

Saying Good-bye to Vacation: AKA, Hello Slogging

Shouldn't life be fun? Not all the time, but MOST of the time?  I don't want to feel like I am always waiting for my "weekend sandwich".  Thirty-six hours to rest, do chores and then, it's Monday...uhhhggg. Back to work. Weeks are long and sandwich's just aren't enough.

Don't get me wrong! Teaching, helping kids and working with like-minded adults is great! It's not the work...per se..it is the pace and the timing of work.  My dream is to say, "Get things started, I will be in by 10...ish". Not every day...but, some days...and other days I will be there by 8 am. It's not that I am lazy, I just want to follow my own beat.  I want flexibility.

I know, I sound like a whiner. I sound soft. Maybe I am. But, maybe I am not.

Is it wrong to want a high quality life? Is it wrong to want to bring your best to ALL of your life...not just to work?

I am ready for something new. Not sure what it is. But, I am definitely ready to get out of the 9 am-5 pm rut, or in my case, 7am - 5pm, or 7am - 7pm, or 9pm. Depends on the day, right?

Big Girl Panties: The Forest Wins (Again)!

Graceful is not a word that I would use to describe my life. In 2013, I was pushed off the treadmill, (once again) and into the woods. The woods are so peaceful. Then, of course, there are bugs, poison ivy, cold and hot weather, snakes, spiders...well, you get the picture. So, though I always land softly amid the undergrowth, daily life in the natural world can be a bit of a challenge.  I didn't even have a tent. Well, I did have an expensive house that came with the treadmill. I had car payments, health care, dental floss and Bed Bath and Beyond on my shopping list. In the woods, my currency was my imagination.  Although my imagination was handy, it wasn't of tangible assistance when the bills were due.

So, what now? Hmmm....I got nuthin'. 
  The phone rang, and one of my dearest friends,  said..."Hey! there is a teaching job available, it would be a great fit while you sort this out!" Unenthused, I said, "Thanks."

Really.  Teaching.  Again? 

I interviewed, laughed at the salary, and took the job. I was SO humbled.

Back to the woods. 

I had my ego up my a'rse. Plainly, I couldn't play kindly with others. Not because I am not nice, but because I was SO ticked off to be on the treadmill in the first place.  My ego wanted to be a hotshot with money flowin' from my Banana Republic pants. My heart was in a different place. 

My heart wanted to learn to love unconditionally. I did not have a clue about that. 

Life has a way of teaching. Sometimes it feels like my undies are riding up. Not pleasant. Time for a different size or undies design. Maybe I needed big girl panties. Oh my, not BIG GIRL PANTIES!

Fast forward. Still in the woods.  Teaching students with emotionally creative coping mechanisms. Hmmm. Might I see myself in these little people? Yes. I believe so. 

I am not out of the woods. Doubt if I will ever leave, again. I have found way too much peace here. I am a better mate, a better mother, a better friend than I have ever been.  It isn't all about me... and, I have learned that I DO matter.

We All Lose

The tenor of this presidential campaign cycle has become tiresome.  Social media has raised the intensity, ferocity, and intimacy of the attacks made by both candidates against the other.  Sound bytes are edited to elevate bias in both directions.  The focus s is more a marketing coup than a presidential contest. Honestly,  I don't think I can watch and listen to this until November.  I am disgusted.

As a teacher, I look into the faces of our future each day. How do I explain  this exhibition to my students?

"Well kids, I know we spend lots of time in school teaching you about the ills of  bullying your classmates and inappropriate use of social media...BUT, what adults do is really different.  We HAVE to do that stuff!"

"Really?",  the students ask.  Yeah, no.

This is embarrassing.  It is a mess.  Trying to manage the emotional responses of the voting populace through social media is not only unseemly, it is frightening.  Last night, at dinner with friends. I polled the wait staff regarding their favorite candidate.  The barkeep wants the independent, Johnson, while others were swayed toward Trump.  Clinton is very unpopular...at least at Scotty's Brewpub.

What is consistent among those I polled is the strength of  their emotional response.  Politics has always been a tender subject, but as our candidates deride one another in their quest for the White House, we are all affected.  No matter who wins.  We all lose.

Building a Wall of Love

The title seems idealistic...even to me. Yet, no other stance seems plausible.  We cannot become like "them".  Whoever "they" are.... in a given moment.  Perpetuating fear, anger, and pain will only create more of the same.  To be clear, I am not suggesting that we are not and will not feel these emotions.  I am and I do, and I am certain that you are and that you do.   We are human.

I am suggesting, however, that we cannot let fear, anger, and pain drive us.  Even now.  Especially now.  We cannot build walls that are cemented with these emotions.  These types of walls will only degrade us and those who stand on the other side of them.  They will weather and crumble, as they are not constituted of a material that will unite and bond us to one another.

Love is the most durable essence.  It is difficult to describe it. But, we each know it when we encounter it or offer it.

I do not believe this is an #LGBTQ issue.  Many of you may disagree.  I believe this issue is far broader and deeper.  #Terrorism has touched people of all colors and types. We have not been "singled out".  We are simply the latest fatality.

Over the coming days and weeks, we will grieve for #orlando.  We will mourn the lives that have been lost and will seek to comfort those who remain.  Those left behind must begin the arduous task of recovering from the brutality that has touched their families and their community.

From afar, we can continue to solve this global crisis by standing together in love.  The greatest leaders of human change have taken this path.  Let's continue their work of building a wall comprised of love. Ultimately, it is the only element that can truly transform our world.

I Got Nuthin'

What do fish, pigs, vegetables, and people have in common?

Fish have fins, veggies have roots, pigs and people have legs.  Pigs squeal, well so do girls (ok, gay men...and my brother-in-law).   Sort of a reach though...isn't it?  Pigs and people are more alike than fish... and all of the aforementioned are even less like veggies.

Honestly, who cares?  Ok, scientists care...farmers care...food distributors care...gardeners probably care.  This is going nowhere.

What the heck was my point, anyway?

My point was.... school might help pigs more than kids.  I thought I had a cool metaphor coming.

Moving along.

It is really hard trying to articulate nuances. I digress.

 This whole thing sounded a lot better in my head than it does on paper.  I am going to chalk this blog up to....SUMMER BREAK!!!!!

On the Outside

The terms "liberal and conservative" have been tossed around for so long that neither has much appeal.  "Liberals" are associated with socialistic policies, and loosely held moral standards.  The conservative aspect is often seen as aligned with elitism, bigotry and hate.  Neither of these characterizations are complete or entirely accurate.

They do, however, make it easy for the average person to "pick a side".  "Side-picking" is what it is all about, isn't it?

The reality is that people are busy.  They don't have the time to delve deeply into issues and policies, even though they are directly or indirectly affected.  Hence, the need for simplistic characterizations, such as, liberal and conservative.

Recently, the passage of RFRA, in the state of Indiana, created a massive stir.  Huge names in business, politics, and entertainment pushed back hard on this "conservative" policy.  Governor Pence and Indiana's state legislative bodies, in the end, were forced to modify RFRA.

Conservatives lead with cries for religious freedom, while liberals countered with the need for anti-discrimination protections for LBGT persons.  Pressure was applied and conservatives gave ground.

At heart, both sides simply want respect. People of faith want to live their faith in accordance with their beliefs.  LGBT people want to be viewed as equals and treated fairly at work, at play, and at worship.

Last night, I attended a Town Hall event intended to clarify RFRA and continue to mobilize LGBT citizens to participate in their government. As I looked around the room, I saw and heard many intelligent people express their desire and hope for equity in all aspects of their lives.

I also discovered my injuries and personal pain from years of living a less than authentic life. Then, I multiplied my pain by thousands.  I discovered the exponential pain of the LGBT citizens of our world.  I wanted to run to the shadows, hidden from your view. I also wanted to stand up and be recognized.  Big things are really never simple.

As we legislate in our country, our states, and our communities, let's weigh the cost of any law in measure of the human pain it will procure.   Are the benefits grounded in equity?  Do the benefits outweigh the human cost?

Of course this is a much more difficult course to take.  It is far easier to continue to see ourselves as simply "liberals" and "conservatives" and make all of our decisions based on these shallow measures.